The Chorus introduces the 3-dimensional way in which they view our emotional spectrum, and their perspective on 'positive' versus 'negative' emotions. Katie describes the paradigm shift that can result from this understanding in how we view emotions, and what's really happening, energetically, when we grieve.
Welcome back, everybody.
So full disclosure, I woke up at 2:30 in the morning, this morning, and started recording this (laughs). I know on paper, it sounds super unhealthy, right? Like, “oh, my god, 2:30 in the morning, like, how are you even functioning during the day?” I totally get it. I totally do.
Years ago, when all this started, I found that The Chorus or just those sensations would sort of often wake me up around four o’clock in the morning. And my brain would totally do that judgment. Of what time is it? How much time is it till my alarm goes off? What do I have to do today? I need the sleep, I can’t be done. Just, man, fire off. As soon as I woke up.
Isn’t it funny how we adjust? How quickly we adjust? After you do it, I don’t know, dozens of times and it kind of works out okay, my brain just doesn’t freak out as much about it (chuckles). It’s like the difference between your first day on a job, you know where everything seems anxiety ridden, very new, very not sure how this is all going to work out to when you’ve been going to the same job for a decade. And you don’t even think about those things anymore. It’s kind of like that.
So yeah, 2:30 in the morning is early. I totally agree. And at the same time now it’s kind of like eh, it kind of works out. I don’t know (laughs).
Relatedly, today The Chorus will talk to us about the Emotional Array, their concept of how they view our emotions. And also this process that we’re going through in awakening, where we first become aware of our judgments, grapple with them, try to understand them, and in that process, we move into allowing them. Loving them. Seeing more fully the purpose that they serve, kinda like gradually learning to allow waking up in the middle of the night.
In the first part of the episode, you’ll hear directly from The Chorus themselves and then afterwards we will discuss. Have fun.
We would like to begin today by reviewing some of the key points, as a human would say, that is that you came here to have an experience of great limitation. Meaning,by denying your perception of the infinite, you would be able to live, to experience, a great variety of kinds of disallowance of energy. And in so doing, you would better know, better understand, better experience, expand into all that you are energetically and your abilities to perceive energy on these frequencies of disallowance.
Though from our vantage point, there are a variety of ways that you perceive these experiences of disallowance. Today, most humans, in your experience, are aware of thing that you call emotions. As we have spoken about in previous episodes, these emotions are interpretations of the different frequencies of disallowance, of these experiences of the denial of your own perception of infinite energy.
Therefore, a human would be most likely to point to experiences on the five senses spectrum in order to explain or validate the emotional responses that they are having, whether it be a thought, a driver cutting them off on their way home, a friend disappointing them or letting them down, or the loss of a loved one a thing or something else that you hold dear.
From our vantage point, however, all things exist energetically prior to their manifestation here, whether it be in thought form, or as a thing, as you call it.
Thus to us, all human emotions can be explained energetically.
And the majority of emotions of which you all are consciously aware today are some version of this disallowance of energy.
Though humans consider joy, happiness, optimism, to be positive emotions, and they consider anger, depression, grief, and shame to be negative emotions, we do not see the linear scale in the same way that you all do.
Rather, we see it more as a three dimensional type of fluid dynamic setup, where your interaction with the energies of disallowance creates, billions of times per second, the experience of these frequencies. Therefore, we see you as very colorful embodiments of these frequencies.
More often than not a human is experiencing multiple emotions at the same time to varying degrees, as you are rapidly moving through different experiences of the disallowance of the perception of infinite energy.
Thus, though you consider joy to be a positive emotion, from our vantage point, it is also an experience of limitation.
“How can this be?” you might ask, “because joy feels so much better to me than depression, or grief, or anger, or rage.” And thus, you have perceived rightly Beloved Ones.
Imagine in this three dimensional sphere, a center point of light. That center point of light, is what you call the sensation of love.
To you, it feels enlightening. It feels flowing, it feels rapturous, it feels good, you might say. From our standpoint, energetically, love is what we would call a cessation in participation in the belief systems of the five senses world that you all have created. That moment of love that you feel is flow. Is, for a moment, your natural return to the frequencies of allowance by simply ceasing for an instant, your participation in all of these beliefs that are required in order to give you the experience of disallowance.
If you were to move outward, in a three dimensional sort of way, in a spherical way from that center point of light, what you might experience swirling closely to that pause in the belief system complex activation, you might call positive emotions. These things do rightly feel better to you than negative emotions, because of their swirling proximity, you might say, to the center point of love.
But Beloved Ones, this is not because positive emotions are better than negative emotions, for all emotions here are powerful experiences of disallowance which is what you came here to have.
Rather, your path of greatest expansion flows in the direction of love and beyond it to frequencies that are beyond the game. That is your preference for love. That is your trajectory. And that is what you are all rapidly expanding towards. In your conscious moments, in your unconscious moments, when you are trying to be more loving, when you forget to be more loving, when you are angry or frustrated, when you are waking, when you are sleeping. In all of these moments, Beloved Ones, you are expanding home, in the direction of love and everything that lies beyond it.
We know that some others have described to you waves of energy, that are perhaps reaching your planet, that are perhaps moving through your kind,that are causing perhaps upheaval as a human would perceive it. For as we have discussed, new energy is often perceived by a human as being chaotic.
But understand Beloved Ones, that you are not adrift on a turbulent sea of waves of energy.
Rather, that wave that you have heard described is what we might call that path of greatest expansion. That wave of energy is life and love and all Creation. It does not knock you over unannounced. It does not sneak up behind you and douse you.
You are the wave.
You are Creation.
You are energy.
And though you are awakening to new and different perceptions of what you have experienced here, we would suggest that as you do so, the power of that wave will be recognized by you as rising up within each of you.
Love is quite simply your destiny.
And the only reason we can say that is because we see from a slightly different perspective your paths of greatest expansion.
It is not a thing you need to earn or work towards or try to be better at. It is simply the direction you have already chosen in which to flow.
We love you, infinitely, Beloved Ones. And we rejoice to see how many of you are coming to remember infinite love, too.
It’s been raining a lot here lately. It’s spring. It doesn’t rain a ton in Colorado, we tend to swing from summer to winter in the course of a single day (chuckles). For anyone who lives in Colorado, you know what I’m talking about. But this spring has been very leisurely, I guess you could say. Lots of rain showers and cool days.I t’s a very shoulder season kind of experience that we don’t often get here for prolonged periods of time anyway.
The other day, I was watching the rain out the window. And the clouds cleared just slightly. And so for a moment, in my backyard, it was pouring this beautiful, gentle rain. And it was sunny. You know when that happens? Raining and sunny at the same time. I think to us humans when we see something like that, so incredible, because there seems to be two very different, polar opposite kind of things happening at the same time. It’s incredible to us, that two different things could coincide like that. Something as evidently different as sunshine and rain clouds. But depending on where you’re standing, like if you were in my backyard that moment was me, you’d get both at once.
The Chorus today introduced the topic of what they call the Emotional Array. It is a perspective on human emotions that is slightly different than our own understanding of our emotional spectrum in a few key ways. This is one of those topics where our understanding of physical reality, meaning our understanding of physical space, and distance and our linear thinking, really starts to show up.
As The Chorus stated, today when most humans think about our own emotions, we think of them in terms of being on a line. Where over there, down in that direction on the line are increasingly what we call negative emotions, the things that feel bad. And then if you move that way down the line, are increasingly positive emotions, or the things that we consider to feel good.
Today, we have a lot of names for the experiences that we have, for the emotions that we feel, on either end of that spectrum. So we call certain experiences on the negative end of the spectrum, anger, depression, sadness, defeat, etc. moving more and more intense, you might say. Sometimes our view of the emotional spectrum is a view of the degree of the intensity of that “bad” feeling, as we would call it. And then the same is true in the positive direction, where at that far end of the spectrum, you might call the best feeling joy. Or some people have said that that best feeling is called love.
So today, The Chorus is in introducing their understanding, or their view, of our experience of emotions. It sort of turns all of that on its head. They remove the line, for starters. They remove the linearity of how we view our emotional spectrum. And instead, they put all the emotions in a sphere, in a three dimensional ball.
And they say, “we see all your emotions in there floating around (chuckles). All of those experiences in the ball, are experiences of the game. That all those emotions that you feel, whether or not they are considered by you to be positive or negative, are all interpretations of the frequencies of disallowance that you’re resonating with right now, for the experience of this game.”
This is the first head scratch moment for a human. Because if all of those emotions that are in the sphere in there floating around are experiences of disallowance, are perceptions of energy, then that means if you and I were sitting across from each other at a table and you were sitting there completely depressed could barely move, didn’t know what to do – as we’ve talked about in our experience of depression – had no idea what to do next, had no sense of yourself or your own inspiration, you and I would say, “man, you are deep in the limitation today. You are really having a human experience. Let me get you a drink, or a cupcake or something.”
And if I were sitting on the other side of the table, and I was having a completely joyful day. Just, everything was going awesome. I was so happy, I was on cloud nine, I felt great, I looked great. Had on an awesome outfit (laughs). Had perfect finances. I just…man, I am crushing it. We would say, “wow, you must really be in flow. You must really be firing on all cylinders, Katie to be in such a state of joy.”
And The Chorus is saying, “well, that may be true. But also, from our vantage point, you are having just a different experience of limitation. Two humans, at the same table, one depressed, one joyful, both experiencing limitation.”
So a human would say, “what? I’m sorry, how does that work? How are we both experiencing limitation in that moment?”
And this is exactly the questions that I had for The Chorus.
As we started to talk about emotions, I began to understand that their perspective is a energetic one. They see all of this from a viewpoint that is beyond the game. And so when they look at us at the experience of sitting at that table, and comparing our different emotional experiences in that moment, they say, “but we see the energy that’s behind all that. We see the energy that you both are resonating with that precedes, you could say, from a vantage point, from a certain view, that experience of the table, and those sensations that you call emotions and the conversation that you have, where you compare them.”
And that energy that they view us resonating with is quite simply to them the frequencies of disallowance. From that broad perspective, from that very distant perspective, you can see how to them these things are the same. They are similar. You and I are resonating in a very similar place in the game.
But then you can see how from our perspective, from within the game, feeling these things, they feel extremely different.
As we’ve talked about in the episodes on anger, and control, The Chorus can give us energetic definitions for these emotions. The way we feel has, to them, energetic aspects to it, and they can get as fine grained as we want. Or they can just say, “well, you’re all resonating with disallowance.” Which isn’t entirely helpful to us. We need something that’s more specific.
And so in this case, you might be wondering, well, “what is joy to them? I get it, I get it. We’re resonating with disallowance. Okay, I kind of get it. But then, how is joy limiting?”
Let’s pretend that you are walking down the beach. It’s a perfect, perfect sunset. There’s no wind, not a cloud in the sky. The sun is setting, the colors are all clear. It’s an incredible sunset. And not only that, but the temperature of the air is just right. You’re not cold, you’re not hot. You’re with someone that you love a whole bunch. And you’re so excited to be with them. And let’s say that you just came from a dinner on the beach, where you laughed and you talked and you felt connected. And it was a wonderful meal, and your server was kind, and the food was great. And then afterwards you thought, “let’s take a walk on the beach.”
If I asked you on the emotional spectrum, what is an emotion that you would append to that experience? You might say, “well, with joy, I guess that’s joy. I mean, it’s pretty joyful. It’s special. And I’m with someone I love. It’s something I’ll remember for a very long time. It’s just incredible.”
And I would say, “absolutely right. A human would call that a joyful moment.”
From the perspective of The Chorus, energetically, what would they say is happening in that moment?
Now remember, as we’ve talked about in previous episodes, anger and trust, some other emotions that we have as humans, they see these things as being interactions, you could say, between us and our ability to perceive energy and the beliefs that we created here.
So in that moment on the beach, what might be happening between you, and the experience of all of these beliefs that we created, that give us the experience of this five senses reality? And, I would suggest, it has a lot to do with what we discussed in the experience of a sense of control, which is a sense of fit.
Joy, according to The Chorus, is the experience of right judgment.
Meaning in a magical moment, all things that we can perceive on all the five senses, including thought-form, all line up in a way that we judge them to be awesome. And that cumulative sensation, that momentary alignment for however long it lasts, is what we call joy.
So let’s take that example on the beach and alter it slightly.
Let’s say that as you’re walking down the beach, and you’re so happy to be with this other person, the wind picks up. And at first, it’s a gentle breeze, and then it kind of turns gusty. And so before you know it, as you’re walking down the beach, and laughing and talking and enjoying the beautiful sunset, your hair starts to blow all over the place. For those of us with long hair, you know what it feels like to have the wind come up and suddenly start blowing your hair into your mouth and into your face (chuckles). And so you’re trying to wrangle your hair with one hand while still enjoying the conversation with the other person.
Or let’s say you have short hair, so the wind picks up and it starts to blow grains of sand into your eyes (chuckles). And so now you’re trying to shield your eyes while also looking at the other person and trying to enjoy the sunset. But you kind of have to keep one eye closed now because there’s a big grain of sand in there and it really hurts.
And so now I might say to you, “now how would you describe that experience with an emotion? Is it still joy? Is it the same sensation as when everything was perfect? Now that you’ve got hair in your mouth and sand in your eye? Is it the same sensation of joy?”
And you might laugh with the other person and you might run back to the car to get out of the the wind and the sand, or you might get grouchy, or he might be like, “ow that really hurts!” And you know sort of have the person block the wind while you try and get the sand out of your eye. Still joy? Is it still that same incredible sensation?
According to The Chorus, it would be slightly different. Because that momentary alignment of all things being rightly judged by us would shift. And something would be judged as being problematic, as less than ideal. And maybe it would only downshift to happiness or to humor. It doesn’t have to drop all the way down to depression in a minute. But it would shift ever so slightly down because, to them, joy is the emotion of right judgment, and judging all things in our five senses perception as being great.
As they’ve pointed out to me over time, this is why joy is so fleeting to humans.
This is why happiness can often be fleeting, because our words are proxies for these emotions. But as we all know, emotions are like spices. They’re like flavors. They’re so different and they’re so varied and we have these words that bucket them and that helps. That has been an evolution, that has been a demonstration of our awakening. But really, it would be hard for most humans to agree to a very specific line that delineates joy from happiness, right? There’s sort of, I’m happy, I’m really happy, I’m joyful, right? It’s sort of a bucket. It’s sort of a collection of emotions, that we don’t have any more comprehensive ways of conveying to each other, beyond that word, or that squeak, as The Chorus would lovingly say.
So we’ve written all of these books about happiness, and why is happiness so hard to achieve? Why is happiness so hard to sustain? And that, from The Chorus’s perspective, is an aspect of our awakening. That we are becoming conscious of these emotional experiences. That we recognize moment by moment, more and more of what we’re feeling as we’re feeling it. That then we talk about it, we study it, we scrutinize it. More and more, these things are becoming clearer to us in conscious ways.
And so as we recognize that there is this emotion, this sensation, that we call joy, or happiness, and it comes and goes. And we all ask ourselves, “why is that? Where’d it go?” And as usual, with most things, in our awakening, what we are drawing our attention to is the underlying structure of the game.
As we’ve talked about in previous episodes, more often than not challenges arise in our lives, because that’s playing by the rules of limitation, which we’re still doing in a way, because we’re sort of evolving from the point of a game, we are awakening from the point of limitation. And so we’re still having challenging, limiting experiences, but they’re always leading us to a more expansive point.
So we recognize that joy and happiness are hard to pin down. And we struggle with it, and we want to be happier. And we want to think more positively. And we want to be more in that state more of the time. But it’s hard.
Why is it so hard? We ask ourselves, and we study it, and we look at it. And we study the opposite end of the spectrum too. If joy is this and depression is that? Why do we feel both? And how do we get between the two? And eventually, what we come to is the relationship between ourselves, energetically, and what we’ve created here, which are vast oceans of beliefs, that collectively gave us the experience of a lack of perception of the infinite.
So now you might be looking at both of us who are sitting at the table, you’re depressed, and I’m joyful (chuckles). And I say, “well, energetically, we know what you’re having.” Because we talked about that in episode 12. We know that energetically depression is sort of an energetic eddy, the attention to an energetic eddy, where these forces are balanced in a way that we’re perceiving something out there that we want, that we know we’re flowing towards, but then also the lack of anything on the five senses spectrum that tells us that that’s possible, or how we would do it. And so we sort of get locked in this, “I don’t know” space. In the sort of, I just, I don’t, I can’t. And that is the sensation of depression. Very limiting! A very conscious experience of limitation. Conscious awareness of this feeling of this eddy, of this being stuckness.
And so we say to ourselves, “why am I here? What’s going on? Why am I so depressed?” Right? So there, you’re having an experience of limitation, but also it’s directing you towards the infinite. It’s saying well, you’re you’re able to perceive things, great things, incredible things down your path of greatest expansion. And yeah, they’re not here yet. You’re expanding, you’re experiencing and perceiving things beyond the five senses. So it’s an experience of limitation, but also it’s an expansive experience of limitation.
And then here I am on the other side of the table, joyful and bubbly and everything’s going great. And I am also having an experience of limitation, because I believe that all things around me are going great. It is an experience of judgment. It is an experience of right judgment. This is why joy can be so fleeting because we came here to experience limitation, and so these moments that we have where everything lines up to be judged as pleasing by us, come and go, Because we didn’t come here to judge everything as going great (chuckles). We came here to sort of unconsciously roll around in experiences of limitation.
But that also explains why different things make different people joyful.
Though, we can all agree that sunshine and roses and things like that are pretty great. The degree of joy, of happiness, that different people feel over different things varies. It has a lot to do with our belief systems. It has a lot to do with what we believe to be incredible or joyful.
So now, here, you and I are sitting in the three-dimensional array, as The Chorus calls it, this sphere of emotions. And we’re both in it. And we’re both having an experience of limitation.
And so here comes the second head scratching moment for a human, which The Chorus alluded to in their introduction today, which is that one of us will say, but hang on, “why does joy feel better than depression?”
Almost every human you would ask, if they looked at both of us sitting at the table, and you said, “which of those do you want to be?” Most humans would point to the joyful person. “well that. I…just….clearly would like to be joyful. I have already been depressed, I don’t really want to be depressed again, it sucked. It was awful, I would much rather be joyful.”
So the question becomes, okay, what’s that about? Why does the sensation of right judgment, of joy, feel better to a human than sensations of depression?
And as The Chorus said today, “well done. Rightly perceived. You’ve become conscious to this. You didn’t always know that. You didn’t always have a name for that. You didn’t always have a way to compare these things. And now you do. And now, you know, consciously that there’s one of these things that you prefer.”
And this is where they said the perhaps the next most incredible thing, which is preference, your preference, is an indication of your path of greatest expansion.
Meaning, every time you go through your day, and have a slight preference for something – that is your path of greatest expansion. It is as simple as that. And it is a staggering is that.
Humans have many ways of judging things. As we’ve talked about, this belief system complex is largely unconscious to us, though it creates our reality billions of times per second. So we minimize, we diminish, a lot of our experience here because we wanted to, we wanted to be fully immersed in the experience of limitation.
And so if you walked into a convenience store at a gas station, and you said, “I have a hankering for a candy bar.” And you walk over to the stand, and you look at the candy bars, and you say, “I think I’ll take that one.” Does that moment of preference, feel like a reflection of the infinite being that you are (laughs)? Or does it feel like you’re kind of just grabbing a candy bar on your way to whatever it is that you’re doing next?
This is human. This is being human. This is that that entire experience is so nicely contained within our beliefs, that we don’t even really think about it. Our existences here have been unconscious, we do not – have not, until recently – had this sort of second track running in the background. That as you walk up to the candy bar it says to you, “but why? Why do I prefer a Milky Way over a Snickers?” You simply do. Yet. This is starting to happen in other areas of our lives where we are being challenged typically in new ways – again, playing by the rules of the game – great limitation surfaces in some area of our lives. And as we struggle with it, and as we grapple with it, usually questions start to show up.
“Why is this happening? Why am I here? Why do I feel this way? How did this get so hard? When’s it gonna be over?”
Sometimes it looks like illness. Sometimes it looks like catastrophe. Sometimes it looks like great loss. Sometimes it looks like a void. Sometimes it looks like you just don’t know what to do for a period of time in the void, and you say, “what is going on? Why am I still here? What is this? Why did I know what to do last year, and this year, I’m completely at a loss?”
As you grapple with those questions, what you are coming to consciousness of are all the aspects of the game. Things that you believe. Things that you’re starting to sense about yourself. Things that turn out to be true without your being able to explain how you knew that they would be true. All of this starts to come to the forefront.
And so in moments like that, we often come around to the things that we want, and allowing them through.
Because we’re finally consciously lifting off of, lifting away from, expanding beyond, however you want to say it, whichever direction works for you, all of these beliefs that prevented us from viewing, from perceiving, more of our infinite natures. The heart and soul of which being the things that we prefer.
Your preference is a reflection of all that you are down to your choice of candy bar. And so when you say I prefer joy over depression though, The Chorus is giving you a standing ovation. It’s not about joy versus depression, though it has been to many of us, as we’ve rummaged our way through this. We scrutinize depression and we scrutinize joy. And we’ve tried to figure out how these two things work, and how to maintain the one that we want for longer periods of time. But The Chorus is saying really what you’re coming to is an understanding of your own preference.
As you move into that sort of perspective, all the details sort of fall away. Because as you grow into a stronger sense of your own preference, it kind of stops mattering whether or not it’s a candy bar, or a place you want to go, or a car you’d like to have. It’s that feeling. It’s that sense of amazingness of flowing with your own preference.
And the judgments that we are accustomed to using here to evaluate our preference to evaluate our desires. And can it happen and will it happen? And do I have enough money for that? And is there enough time? – all those judgments, that are the beliefs of limitation, soften.
Do they go away?
Now that is an interesting question.
In fact, you could ask the same question about your emotions.
Does depression go away? When we are expanded, when we are flowing in the direction of our preference? When all these beliefs soften? When we’re less in our heads and more in the sensations, will depression disappear from the human race?
But then I could ask it equally about joy couldn’t I?
If depression and joy are both different flavors of the experience of disallowance, then as we expand, do both depression and joy, disappear or fade away from our experiences?
As a way of answering that, let’s go back to what The Chorus said today about love.
Now we’ve touched on love here and there over the course of several episodes – it’s such an important topic. But prior to their description today, where might you have put the sensation of love on our image, our concept of emotions on a linear scale? Where on the line?
Down in negative emotions? Probably not. I don’t think most people would put love down there next to rage and depression (chuckles)? You can! You can. I’m just saying, a majority might not. Okay.
Would you put love kind of up in the positive end of the spectrum? Often humans do. Would you put love at the tippiest point of positive emotions? Yes. Often humans say that love is perhaps even surpassing joy. It’s somewhere up there, somewhere out there, depending on which way your line goes at the farthest end of what we call our most positive emotions.
And yet, love can feel different than joy. Can’t it? Well, hang on. No, I mean, sometimes you are joyful when you are loving. Well, I mean, you can be happy and loving…
You see, already these flavors, these delicate nuances between all these sensations that we have, boiling them down into single words, doesn’t quite express the variety of sensations that we have around a singular emotional term. What is love? Versus Joy? Versus happiness?
And The Chorus today says, “well, it’s really up to you. But from our perspective, we see love in a different position. And you can put that position actually on the linear scale, or you can put it in our sphere, in our three dimensional array of emotions.”
And they said that love is actually the midpoint, or as they said, the center point.
So on your line, positive and negative emotions, to them, love would not be at the far end of the spectrum. Love would be in the middle, right between positive and negative.
And in their swirling vortex of fluid and dynamic three dimensional emotions, love would be a point of light in the middle of it all.
That is because their definition of love is an energetic one. It’s beyond the game, from their vantage point, as usual. They see anger and all these other things as being part and parcel of the way that we are expanding, the way that we are currently experiencing the game as we expand beyond it. And love to them is no different.
To them love is, as they said, the momentary cessation in participation in the belief systems of the five senses.
They call it a pause.
They call it neutrality.
They call it allowing.
Meaning in that moment of love, consciously, we are not active in judgment.
There’s nothing in the belief system complex that we are activated on, that we are energizing.
Instead, we have shifted, you could say, into a place of judgeless-ness, of beliefless-ness (chuckles), of allowing everything. There is no scrutiny. There is no analysis that is molding the energy into anything else. We are quite simply loving. Allowing whatever it is that we are casting our gaze upon to be whatever it is, in that moment.
As we’ve talked about in previous episodes, we understand that sensation don’t we? That we can scrutinize, judge, and analyze and try to improve. But in a moment of loving perhaps someone, someone close to us, someone we think the world of, we don’t judge them. We think they’re great. We think it’s tremendous. Whatever it is they’re saying or creating or trying or doing. It’s just marvelous to us. That’s love.
And so it’s in the middle of all the other beliefs of limitation to The Chorus, because all the other beliefs and experiences and emotions of limitation are all part and parcel of the activation of the belief system. The emotional experiences that we have are perceptions of our own experience of limitation, which is driven by all the beliefs that we created here.
And so when we feel love, and we are momentarily pausing our activation of all of those beliefs, energetically, we are sort of at a point of neutrality in the middle of the sea of all the beliefs and all the corresponding emotional reads that we have of those frequencies.
So now, here’s where our understanding of distance and space starts to show up. Because as we’ve already been talking about, well, first of all, we saw it on a line going up and down a scale. And as we find ourselves slipping down the scale, we all think, no, no, no, no climb out of it! Go up, go out, go back down the line! Back to happiness! Away from depression, away from rage, right?
This sort of linear thinking has been one of the main ways that we’ve structured our own understanding of our own emotions. And The Chorus has already thrown that out the window and put it in a ball.
Okay, and so then we had love sort of at the end of the scale with positive emotions. And The Chorus has thrown that out the window. They’ve said, “nah, it’s in the middle of all of it.”
And then they said, the next most important thing, which is from their viewpoint, there’s no such thing as positive and negative, there’s no such thing as better or worse, that all these emotions are just different experiences of limitation. It is our ability to perceive these energies as emotions.
Okay, so then we come back to it, though, how do we represent that? How do we represent our preference for some emotions over others?
And they said, ‘Well, you could think of it, in a way, as sort of orbiting around the center point of love. And so the things that you prefer, typically are closer to the center point of love, because that’s the direction of your path of greatest expansion right now. And the things that are further away, you could say, from that center point of love, are not preferred by you. Because, you know, that’s not where your path of greatest expansion is.”
I want you to think about that for a second. And become aware of kind of the image that forms in your mind…
So you’ve got the center point of love, and you’ve got sort of the things you prefer closer to it, which are often positive emotions. Then you got the things that you don’t prefer sort of further away.
Now, if you’re like me, it kind of started to look like a solar system (laughs).
Where the center point of love was like a sun. And the innermost planets are all the positive emotions, you know, like mercury being joy. And all the negative emotions are, you know, sort of the furthest out planets. So you know, Pluto being the sad little planet of depression (laughs). Sorry, Pluto. Oh, it’s not even a planet. I know! I know, I shouldn’t say that. The the former planet Pluto being depression. Doesn’t that just fit? Poor Pluto. Anyways.
So as you are visualizing this, right, the lines sort of show back up again, don’t they?
We went from being on a linear spectrum to now you’ve got orbits and orbits tend to follow paths. And those paths tend to stay in lines. At least currently, to the human understanding.
And so we didn’t get that far away from our idea of positive and negative did we (laughs)? We took our linear spectrum and we’re like okay, and now it revolves in a circle where the the happiest emotions are closest to the sun and the negative emotions are furthest from the sun. Right?
I operated under this understanding for a while, without understanding that I even felt that way. Until I came across one of those challenging experiences, that drew my attention to something that I believed, which was this: that I don’t prefer negative emotions, which was then therefore the negative emotions, I still in some ways want to avoid.
Grief is one of those negative emotions for us, isn’t it?
Sadness is hard.
Grieving is hard.
Humans grieve when we lose things. Perhaps it’s the loss of a dream. Perhaps it’s the loss of a business. Perhaps it’s the loss of a dear pet, a dear friend, a loved one. Humans have this conscious understanding of grief. And recently, what we have been coming to is an even deeper understanding, an even broader conscious awareness of grief, that sometimes we may go through grieving processes, and we’re not even consciously aware of what it is that we are grieving the loss of.
As we’ve come to know our psyches, our beliefs, our psychology more and more, we’ve come to understand that even slight shifts in our own identities, can trigger a grieving process.
Ever gotten a bad haircut (chuckles)?
Ever thought you looked a certain way or was viewed a certain way, then to realize that that’s not true anymore?
Ever thought that you were a certain kind of person. And then through an experience, or a shift in your own life, you realize that you’re not anymore?
The human identity, the human concept of self, as The Chorus often calls it, has been largely centered in our belief systems. Our judgments of our lives run non-stop in the background. These beliefs, as we’ve talked about, create who we are and what we live billions of times per second.
As we awaken to more of what we are beyond these belief systems, we have another powerful experience of both. Meaning that we understand in the new ways, the people that we thought we were. And we also begin to see more of what we also are.
As you all know, as I’ve shared here and there over the previous episodes, coming to terms with this spiritual stuff that I do has been challenging. Over the last few weeks, I’ve actually made some progress in that department, you could say. I’ve talked about it more. I’ve told even a couple people. I’ve introduced myself, I guess you could say, from this new perspective that I have. Meaning I was sort of honest about what it is that I’m doing. I don’t often know what to call it. But I sort of stumbled through a description of it, as opposed to just avoiding it completely, which was a big step for me.
As I started to do this, as I started to embrace more of what I feel like I am, have become perhaps, I also started to grieve.
As usual, when you’re awakening and you walk into one of these emotional experiences, you know that that’s what it is that you’re having, but there’s also the game piece part of you that has no idea why it is that you’re having this experience. And so it was as I started to grieve. The grief didn’t just show up, you know, once and it was over, but really each time I took a step forward in accepting – in allowing, in loving – more of what I am, and becoming, there was a corresponding response from another part of myself that was sad.
For the longest time, I recognized this part of me, but I didn’t know really what to do about it, or why it was there, or why it was sad, because I do believe that I am expanding in a direction that I prefer. And this should be good news. Changes of identity can often be scary, I understood that. But I didn’t understand why I was also so sad.
As usual, with things that we’re not quite ready to come to consciousness to, it’s because they’re still doing a job. They’re still serving a purpose on our path of expansion. When we are ready to consciously understand that thing, it’s usually because we have moved through it. This is why when you look back at your life, and see that you have struggled with a thing through multiple eras, or it continues to plague you as a human often says, it’s because – as The Chorus and I like to talk about it as – it’s an engine, it’s a driver. It is driving you through other experiences that you are becoming conscious of. It’s driving you through other ways that you are awakening. And when it’s done its job, when it’s served its purpose, you will awaken to the engine itself, and you will understand it, and you will be able to expand beyond that.
So it was only recently that I was able to ask The Chorus about grief. That I was able to finally have space, to really sit down with them and say, “okay, there’s nothing else here this time except the grief. Usually, I’m coming to understand this new identity, or I’m realizing these things I’m moving towards, and this time it is just me and sadness. So what is it? What’s grief?”
And they said, an energetic definition of course, as usual. That grief is a five senses experience of a release of something from our mental structures. So it is the perspective from within the game, that something is being released from the belief systems that we use to drive our experience here.
Perhaps this will make the most sense to you in the experience of grieving the loss of someone you love to death. As we talked about, just recently, in Episode 16, I believe, about the void of death and what happens and where we go after death. According to The Chorus, it’s just different frequencies. Our loved ones are alive and well. They’re infinite. We’re infinite. They didn’t disappear. They didn’t go into a void. They’re not far away. But by our experience of limitation here in the game, when someone vibrates off these frequencies, we disallowed the perception of them. Because if we were here in the game, and we could view all the other frequencies of non-limitation, our experience of limitation wouldn’t be as limiting. And so we created this concept of death – of a moment in time that happens, you could say, when someone departs, and from the vantage point of The Chorus that is quite simply when someone departs the frequencies of limitation.
And so though they are still there, and though they are still wonderful, and though they are having a grand old time on the frequencies beyond the game, those of us who are still resonating in the game will not perceive them.
But as we know now, each time we manifest here, each time we exist in the game, we are contributing to the construction of the game. So we create beliefs we add to the experiences of limitation, we immerse ourselves in what’s already been here, and we continually construct it while we’re here. And so you could consider each lifetime sort of a new addition to the belief system complex.
Consciously, we are not aware of much of that at all. As we’ve discussed, you and I don’t sit here billions of times per second, and list all the billions of beliefs we’ve just added. Rather, we’re having a good time being limited, and experiencing the embodiment of these things.
So as you and I experience this world together and build many manifestations together, that we add to the belief system complex, and we continue to move through it all unconsciously, there comes a point when I’m ready to leave the game. And as I go, by virtue of the agreements that we all made to be here, and to be limited, you can’t see where I’m about to go.
And so all of the beliefs that you and I have created together, that you have constructed about me in how you run your days, as I leave, are also released from the span of your conscious experience in the game.
We live this, don’t we? That when you lose someone, they go from being a day-to-day aspect, a part of life that we plan on, to not being there. All the beliefs that we hold about that they’ll be there when we get home, or that they’ll be there when we call them and they’ll pick up on the other end of the line, all of those things are released, because they are no longer a part of our conscious experience of the game. That sensation of releasing those things that represented them from our mental structures, is what humans call grief.
The grieving process is the release of those things from the mental structures that we continue to hold, as we continue onward in our conscious experience of the game.
Grieving is a process.
And that is why with the distance of time, the intensity of grief often fades.
It isn’t as acute as the moment of their departure from the game. Because over time, you have been able to release the beliefs, the aspects of your day, that connected to their beliefs and their existence in the game.
They’re still there. Friends, they’re still there.
All the experiences you had with them are still there.
All things exist infinitely.
The experience of loss is our experience.
When you expand beyond the game, and you reconnect with all the people that you love, or have ever loved, you also will be free to revisit any of those experiences that you’ve had with them, and to create an infinite number more.
Grief, the sensation of grief, as usual, with many of the experiences that we have here is an energetic read of an experience of limitation. That your consciousness does not have infinite capacity here, that it has been narrowed to what we embody moment-by-moment in the experience of limitation. That you can’t consciously be aware of your entire lifetime of experiences with them, and also the frequencies that they’re on right now beyond the game, is a construct of this experience.
As your consciousness expands, you’ll be able to do that.
So what about grieving your loss of self? What about grieving those changes of identity? Is it the same?
Well, in many ways, yes.
There are beliefs that we create, as we come into this existence, as we interact with others, as we help construct the limitation of the game, that we hold about ourselves, about our concept of self, about our own identities here. As we expand beyond the experience of the game, we move into broader definitions of self. We become more than the ways that we have classically defined ourselves here, which is based on five senses manifestation. The way we look, the way we sound, the things we’ve done, the things we dream of doing, the things we say, the way we say them, our senses of humor, our personalities, so much of our identities here have been limited to what we create on the five senses spectrum, because so has our perception of the infinite been limited to what we create here on the five senses spectrum.
Just as the universe consists of more than this, so do you.
But as The Chorus has described, awakening is the experience of expanding from the point of limitation. We don’t eject out of the game and turn around and look at it (chuckles). We keep one foot in the manifestation of limitation in these frequencies. And we expand from that point.
It is a most particular experience, it is a most incredible experience of awakening. And so as we do so, not only do we expand into more of what we are, but we come to the conscious understanding of grief itself, which is releasing from our mental structures, from our definition of self, beliefs.
Beliefs about what we thought we were, and who we thought we were. We move beyond those boundaries, we expand beyond it. And as we do so, we come to the conscious understanding that grief was our energetic signal that we were releasing something from our beliefs.
As you believe more and expansive things about yourself, you are also very naturally as part of awakening, releasing the more narrow beliefs of self that we all held.
I asked them once I said, “if all things are infinite, and that part of me, that existence, that identity that I had still exists, why do I grieve, losing it? If I’m becoming conscious of all this, if this is an experience of expansion, why grief?”
And they said, “the duality that you often feel as you change your identity, as you accept, as you allow more of what you are, is the experience of a broadening consciousness. You’re both. You are the part of you that senses that this is right, and wanted, and preferred, and wonderful to move forward and expand into more of what you are. And you also feel the perception from the part of you that is still active within the game that grieves the loss of what you were. You feel both.”
Just like being able to stand in my backyard and see the sun shining and the rain falling at the same time.
It is an incredible experience of a very specific perspective of awakening. A few miles away to the north and you would see sunshine. A few miles away to the south and you would be fully buried under clouds and rain. A few miles away, and you are your fully expanded awesome, infinite self. And a few miles away in another direction, you are fully immersed in the game. Your consciousness is expanded to perceive both.
So let’s go back to the solar system of our emotions (chuckles). Where we have poor Pluto, the former planet, of depression. And we have Mercury, the planet of joy. And all the lines that they revolve in around the center point of love.
Grief is somewhere around Neptune in my understanding of my own solar system. Not preferred! Way out there, right next to depression. And I operated under this understanding for a very long time, and it served me. It did.
But then I came to this most recent crossroads, and I heard something else that The Chorus said today in a new way: that our path of preference calls us home. And we are following it to love and we prefer love. But that it’s already happening. And there’s not a thing we need to earn, there’s not a thing we need to do, there’s not a thing we need to overcome, or even try to consciously understand to get there.
Our expanding consciousness is the path.
It’s not a straight line through the solar system.
We can forgive ourselves for seeing a line there too. But it’s not a straight road from Pluto to Mercury and into the sun. Our consciousness is the path. That expansion is the path.
We are expanding to encompass, to consciously understand, all the things. All the things we’ve experienced here, all the emotions that we have. And though I prefer the sun, that is at the center of my solar system, I am expanding to everything that’s in it, and everything that’s beyond it. To things that you and I don’t even consciously recall yet, but that we will.
To loving all the emotions that we have here. To allowing every planet, every sensation, and everything that’s in the space beyond our solar system that we are about to discover.
Our path of greatest expansion isn’t into the sun and out of here.
Our path of greatest expansion starts at love and grows to encompass everything that we experience.
Said another way? Well, for every planet you land on, you can view it from the five senses perspective and analyze it, get mad at it, maybe hate it, maybe be joyful over it.
But eventually your path of greatest expansion will call you home.
And eventually, you will bring the light of the sun to that place and you will love.
Said another way? YOU are the sun.
Unsponsored shoutout to Music from Artlist:
Show Intro: Floating Point by Roie Shpigler
Chorus Transition In: Present Moment by Borrtex
Chorus Transition Out: Incandescent with Passion by CK Martin
Outro: No Worries by Jak
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