Katie returns to the concept of distance and relationships, this time discussing the experience we call "falling in love with someone's potential." How could this relate to the concept of our many parts - shadowy or non - and the somehow always singular concept of _The_ Higher Self? As we continue to expand we might find that in sensing the fractures in consciousness, our hearts feel the distance between us and the aspects of others we perceive. In letting love continue to pour through our systems, regardless of its direction, we may find greater clarity about ourselves, our path, and what led us to know those things about others ahead of their being able to recognize it in themselves. Enjoy!
Alright, so we’re tracking through these topics related to distance this season. We’re doing really well. And so now it’s probably time we moved back towards relationships, again. Not necessarily because relationships are definitive of our concepts and experience of distance. But because it’s such a visceral experience of these concepts, that it’s maybe one of the ways that it’s easiest to bring these things to light, to bring these things to consciousness, is when we have those “ohhhh” moments about something that has happened to us in the course of our relationships.
So I want to ask you a question.
Have you ever fallen in love with someone’s potential?
Now, I can already sense that some of you had like a groan, “ugh, yes.” Some of you might be thinking, “well, I don’t know, maybe not really.” And that’s fine. You can land anywhere you want on the spectrum of answers to this question. But what I’m pointing out is, no matter to what degree, have you ever fallen in love with something that you thought was there, or sensed was there, that then maybe over the course of the relationship did not appear in the way that you had hoped? And this could be a romantic relationship. But the same thing applies for friendships as well.
As we talked about in season one, or I think in season two, first impressions, formulate a lot of how our belief systems then continue to look at and treat a person. The lock down of expectation is really rapid in our belief systems. Because, as we’ve talked about, the limitation experience here isn’t like a big welcomer of New Energy, and change. And so we don’t allow people to change billions of times per second, even if they choose to do so, we may often continue to see and experience them in the way that our belief systems locked them in, early on in our relationships.
So to make this example, even more visceral, what I would like you to do right now if you can do it, is to say out loud, the names of the people who you fell in love with their potential. So ex boyfriends, ex girlfriends, or maybe even ex best friends. Go on, just say it. Just say one name out loud, if you can.
Now, I am guessing that the name that you just said out loud is historical. It would be unlikely for a human to give me an example of someone whom they fell in love with for their potential and are still currently in a relationship with. Why? Because typically, but perhaps not always, this is a revelation that comes to us after the relationship has ended. Once things have gone sour, once we have sort of taken our space and reflected, is usually when we realize that there was a really big difference between the person with whom we ended the relationship, and the person with whom we thought we had at the start of the relationship.
So if you’re a rare person out there who is currently in a relationship with someone and you fell in love with their potential, and it’s not there. Maybe that’s because you have allowed each other to be surprised by something else that was in there. And good for you. Maybe you’re already on that expansive relationship trajectory that The Chorus indicated early in this season.
But the point I’m making is not necessarily about can you or can’t you fall in love with potential and does it or doesn’t it work in a relationship, I’m pointing out a larger aspect of the way that we utilize distance in our experience, and the way we can utilize distance as we come out of this experience.
So let’s move a little further into this example.
So you break up with the person, realize that you liked some aspect of them that shimmered in the dark there, and really just ended up dating the dark. And so we say to ourselves, “oh, I fell in love with their potential. I expected this seed that I felt in this person to sort of grow more in our relationship or as we got to know each other. And instead, it just kind of stayed that small or even fleeting at times.” And so then you move on to your next relationship.
Now, a question that we might ask as people on a spiritual path is, “what did you ‘learn’ from that relationship?”
Now, many of us might say, “well, I learned not to fall in love with potential. That didn’t work out so well. It seemed to be my fault. It seemed to be my illusion that I projected onto the relationship. And then when that expectation was not met, I was dissatisfied.” Which would be a very self aware thing to say, because you are then conscious of the ways in which you viewed the whole situation and set expectations for the whole situation that as we might say the other person may or may not necessarily have had much control over. Perhaps they don’t see their potential the way that you do. Perhaps they don’t feel like it’s missing. Perhaps there are any number of reasons that seem quite valid, that they may not want to move in the direction of the shining little seed inside of them that you saw.
So often, we take the blame, as we talked about a couple episodes ago, and we will say, “oh, my bad. I saw something in you that you did not see in you. And I thought that’s what I was dating and you didn’t know.” And it didn’t work out. Right? Okay, great.
So we say afterwards, “yeah, I learned not to do that anymore. Because, you know, it didn’t work out.”
And I might say, “well, tell me a little bit more about why it didn’t work out.”
And you would say, “well, Katie, you just said it. I thought I was in a relationship, with maybe this form of the person, and they never really were that form of the person.”
And I might say, “they never were?”
And you might say, “well, okay, they were at times, because I recognized this part of them early in our dating relationship, like, it’s what drew me in. But then it kind of never showed up. Or stopped showing up at all, consistently.”
And I might say, “oh, okay, so you know, I’m new to earth here. So maybe, you know, I’m just gonna kind of put it like this – the percentage of the time that the potential showed up was not enough time for you to continue dating the rest of them that was not the potential?”
And you might say, “wait a second, what? I don’t even understand your question.”
I might say, “well, if we’re breaking it down, you know, just mathematically into percentages. And let’s say, you know, the percentage of them, that was the potential was only 10%. Okay? And so that wasn’t enough for you to deal with, you know, the other 90%? Am I kind of thinking of that correctly?”
And you might say, “well, no, it’s just like, the whole person, you know, wasn’t what I thought. The whole 100%?”
And I was like, “yeah, yeah, I get that. But let’s dig in a little further. Is it that if their potential was there, 30% of the time you would have been okay with the other 60? Or is it like you needed a clear, 50/50 split? Or is it that you really just needed all 100% of the potential and 0% of anything else?”
And then you might say, “okay, well, yeah. I guess, I guess I had hoped for, you know, 100% of the person I fell in love with. The potential part of them that I fell in love with, and instead there was this other stuff.”
And I would say, “okay. What is that other stuff?”
And you might say, “well, it, I would classify it as, I don’t know, times, they acted differently than this other version of them that I that I thought that they were. They said different things, or they made different jokes, or they even maybe treated other people differently than this potential part of them would.”
And I might say, “that’s fascinating. Because I don’t know, I’ve been down this Awakening road a little while. And, you know, people often say that this stuff that I did classified as sort of like a psychosis or schizophrenia where you have like these different parts of you, and maybe they’re not all aligned. And really, we’re saying the same thing. And you’ve even dated people like this. They had this potential part of them, but then they had this other part of them.”
And you might say, “yeah, well, my ex did seem a little crazy.”
And I might say, “yeah, well, another way of saying that, is that really what are all of these parts that humans tend to have?”
It is a question that is both staggering in its simplicity, and its breadth.
We talk about these parts, we talk about these aspects of ourselves, whether it be from different pieces of our personality to different aspects of things that we are remembering, to different eras in our lives, be it childhood, or adulthood,or middle age. It’s a framework that is so commonplace that we may even talk about different parts of ourselves wanting different things throughout the day. And not really think twice about the fact that humanity in some ways, has accepted wholesale, that we are a composite of different pieces.
We are at once at war with all of our pieces, and also trying to allow for all of our pieces, in the same way that we are trying to allow for all of the pieces that seem to rise and fall in others.
Why does humanity have so many pieces?
Is it just a framework? Is it just a concept, a way of understanding all the kaleidoscope of different needs, wants, and desires that we have and how they change moment by moment depending on perhaps what we’re believing in any given moment?
Is it an aspect of our souls and something much broader and deeper?
And when we talk about The Higher Self have you ever noticed how there’s always just one? It’s THE Higher Self. So what has the higher self got going on that it’s all unified and down here is kind of a fragmented mess?
Now I am sure every culture around the world has created their answer to this question. Whether it’d be one that’s based on an ancient mythology, one that’s based on enlightenment, transcendence, and the Wheel of Karma.
But is it possible that perhaps we feel that there are so many pieces of ourselves because what we’re actually sensing is the distance between them.
In last week’s episode, I made a suggestion that as we begin to resonate with aspects of different civilizations and cultures that we can understand, the distance between us and those civilizations and cultures will close.
We could imagine how a time machine, perhaps constructed with beliefs that I don’t completely understand from this conscious perspective, could bounce you around between these different frequencies. And that is an infinitely valid perspective in an infinitely valid universe. But if we’re looking at this scenario, from the perspective of beliefs, would it be likely or perhaps simply probable, that those “time periods” that you might vibrate to in your machine of time, might simply be reflections in some ways of those beliefs, of those things that you already vibrate with and understand. Meaning, if you believe you got to take a time machine, you’ll probably end up in other timelines that utilize machines, because there’s an unsaid understanding of the benefits of things that are built to circumvent potentially the fabric of reality as it is then known. Or also, you might vibrate into a time period where they believe also that you can affect civilizations by affecting actions and five senses manifestations in their timelines. It’s as simple a concept as if I pull the rug over here and ripple it, you’ll feel an effect over there on your corner of the rug, made more complicated by lots of machines and mathematical calculations.
But on the whole, the question that would need to be asked is, are the beliefs in any of the timelines that you might go to in your machine fundamentally different than what you believe?
Contrast that to what The Chorus suggests, which is that distance is an emanation of frequency. And therefore if you resonate in a sense of understanding with someone else, you draw closer to them, whether that be across the distance of time or geographic space. It is that simple.
That would mean therefore that those who have an open heart, those who are expanded and who vibrate with more than one frequency, but potentially who vibrate with millions of frequencies, could more easily travel through and navigate to a vaster universe. In so doing, in having an open door of possibility in their hearts, they might be able to vibrate into civilizations, timelines, geographic places, that are very different from their core beliefs, because they are connected by way of the sense of possibility in which they are open to very different expressions of reality, and manifestations by these other civilizations.
In this way, those who journey would be more likely to have expansive experiences of connection in those other experiences, because more likely than not what they would perceive of those other civilizations, they would allow in as a possible expansion.
That sense of possibility is allowance. And in allowance, we expand. And therefore they may draw out of those experiences and those other places, the most expansive aspects of them.
So you might get in your time machine, Blip out of the room, but back again, five minutes later and say, “I just spent the last five years in this other civilization.”
And I might say, “what did you learn?”
And you say, “well, they taught me all about their technology, and about how their planet is hurting, and they gotta clean it up. And they’ve got this, you know, other race of beings that’s trying to do this and take over that.”
And I might say, “are you sure you left?”
And you say, “yeah, sure, it looked different. You know, they, they wore different clothes. And Earth was it was kind of like Earth, but it wasn’t really it was a different color. And they had these other trees.”
And I would say, “those are beautiful five senses expressions of slight variations. But we do that here all the time. I mean, here I am a slight variation of your beliefs. And the only difference between us is that, you know, I kind of have a different face, and maybe different hair.”
And you might say, “but it but it was so different.”
And I would say, “Sure. On the visible wavelengths of light, and potentially all the wavelengths of our five senses, it does sound varied. But what did you feel in your heart? Were they all the sensations that you’ve already felt before?”
And you might say, “what do you mean?”
And I would say, “well, come with me in my little, you know, resonating mat here, where I just kind of sit here and I open up to the possibilities of the universe. And then I sort of sense something or okay, I know that’s new. So here, take the gold knob again.”
And I hand you the non from the previous episode.
And I say, “now when we shift frequencies, I want you to feel if there’s anything new in your resonance.”
You might say, “new?”
And I say, “Yep!” And before I give you a moment to contemplate it, I turn the knob. This time I spin it all the way around like three times. So who knows where we’re going to end up! And we vibrate into a different place entirely.
Now, this time, it would be a little challenging for me to put it into terms of five senses sensory perception, although there are probably things there that you see and hear and can taste and touch. But also, you might be completely overwhelmed by the depth of sensations that are coming to you from parts of your body and your being that you didn’t even know existed.
You resonate in a type of expanse of love that is breathtaking. You feel and you sense more of the natural world around you than you ever knew to be possible. The connection seems vast. That potential seems huge. And then after a little bit of time, I turn the knob back, and we come back to my meditation mat in my room.
And now the question might make a lot more sense. When I say, “did you feel anything different?”
And practically breathless, you might say, “oh my gosh, I’ve never felt anything like that before!” And that would be true from this conscious perspective.
Your heart is the best indicator of the distance you have traveled, and also the distance that remains in any situation.
Sometimes I think as humans when we feel the distance that remains the hurt and the heaviness of its of its gap, of its missingness, can seem very hard to shoulder.
I’ll give you an example.
If we came back from a place as dazzling as that, where you could feel all of those things, and you had to stay here, in this perspective, in this version of reality, where none of those things could be felt but carried the memory of a place where they could, it might be kind of challenging, wouldn’t it?
Perhaps not unlike knowing and feeling someone’s potential. And carrying that in a relationship where the memory of it haunts you, as you continue to live other felt experiences with that person that do not reflect those things.
Potential isn’t an illusion. It is a felt sense of something that is real, and is real when that person resonates on those frequencies.
You see, my dear friends, something happened a long time ago, that fractured our perspective of the universe.
We are in some ways beyond all of this still whole. And maybe at times, that is the Higher Self that we are referring to, which is the Higher Self that we all still are. And it would be easy for us to use spiritual platitudes and get general and sort of just wave our hands in the air and set that to the side. But also, these are real energetic structures. These are real things that settled into our fracture of consciousness, and we are starting to feel them and become conscious of them.
The more we talk about our parts, the more we utilize this concept, the more we’re aware of these different things, truly what we are becoming more aware of is the aspects of the fractures that lie in between these different portions of ourselves.
And, as we’ve mentioned before, awakening is not a straight shot. It is lots of curving lines, and multiple different energetic directions at once. It is a bowl of spaghetti, it is a bowl of flowing water. And so there are times when we will recognize in another a part of their wholeness that is possible in there somewhere beyond the raging flood.
And for a period of time, there will be some of us who see the potential in others, who see the whole aspect of their whole consciousness and their whole soul, where they cannot. And we will need to continue on in this reality. Talking to them about 3D things, because they cannot at times understand that there is much more. Tolerating the portions of them that we know are constricted and limiting, because they can’t quite yet expand into more of that totality, more of the whole picture that they are.
It is in some ways like walking around in the insane asylum only now it’s not us who are the crazy ones. Now, it’s the ones who have not yet been able to grasp those things, who are potentially still working on it, who are just starting to awaken.
I won’t say that it’s easy to sit next to someone, to know their full potential, and to feel the immense distance between the aspect of them that is talking to you, and the fullness of everything that you know that they are.
The distance will feel acute. It will feel painful in a very visceral way. And that is because your heart as a navigational compass is becoming more accurate than ever.
You are sensing the fractures. The fractures that are the distances of perception between these different pieces of ourselves that were sprinkled over what we would call lifetimes or time-places, realities planets, even dreamscapes of ourselves.
This is what we are bringing back to wholeness.
And it’s going to take a minute. It won’t be forever. But there is at times real reasons for why someone can’t awaken to their full potential yet. Reasons that have to do with what we are rebuilding, and in what order, and the specific roles that they are able to play. And when they are able to play them.
You see, this is a team effort. And if we’re going to do this, right, sometimes that means we need to love the potential in others even when it disappears.
We haven’t talked much about that ancient language that showed up. But they definitely have a lot to say about our hearts, and our energetic systems, because they’re supporting our efforts to come back to wholeness, to heal the fracture of consciousness. To navigate our way out of this, you might say.
Something they told me early on is that often humans, from their perspective, view love as directional. I love this person, I love that pet, I love this chocolate. From their view, love is not appended to a direction, it is simply something that wells up within us. And we let it flow through us no matter where it’s heading. And they trust that somehow, some way the universe returns that love, even if it’s from a different direction, from a different person, from a different relationship.
I told them that that’s hard for a human to hear because if we continue to feel love for someone, and they don’t reciprocate, we tell ourselves that that’s an imbalance and a broken relationship and that we’re being abused.
I felt their sadness at seeing my perspective here in what they call the labyrinth, or the illusion. And in that way, I also saw more clearly their perspective, that love is infinite. That love strengthens the bearer. And that the universe is constantly sending love back and over again, through many different directions.
To them, there is no mistake in love. There can be no deceit. There are no errors. If you fell in love with someone’s potential, and you felt that well up inside of you. And maybe you continue to love all of them even without that potential and were still constantly disappointed over and over again. And maybe you couldn’t shake them. Maybe you kept thinking about them. Maybe your heart led you back to them over and over again. To us, we might mentally scrutinize that and evaluate that relationship and say it wasn’t healthy.
To them, the only in clear indicator is where your heart directed you. You become stronger for allowing that love. And without question, somehow that love will be returned to you.
If you’re the first one to wake up in an insane asylum, surrounded by friends, family, and loved ones who are still suffering the disease, you may have to love a lot of crazy people. And they may not understand yet what, why, or how you’re doing it. Or how difficult it is for you to continue to allow them to be crazy, feeling within you everything that you know that they are beyond this experience.
But this is what a warrior does.
We show up. We are present. And if our heart reaches out with love for one around us, we allow that to be so.
Trusting, knowing, deeply that Creation surrounds us. And so too will the reflections of the love which we share.
I am sending you so much light for any and all of the difficult loves that you bear. Because we love you. Infinitely
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