EPISODE TRANSCRIPT
Kick-off
Right now, I am taking a break from evacuating. As I record this, a hurricane is projected to make landfall close to where we are currently renting in Florida while we look for our house. And I’ve almost got everything packed. We’ve almost got everything sorted. We’ve got plan B and C and D in place. Amazing people that we have just met in these last few weeks are offering to help us and to let us stay with them. It’s been incredible.
And years ago, I would not have been able to take a break. I would have just kept plugging away or finding something to do, especially with something very big and potentially catastrophic and unknown right around the corner. There’s no way I could have slowed down.
And now I feel the sense of them, and that peaceful place. When it’s been missing for a long time, I come back around to it. I realize how much I benefit from it, how much it’s valuable, how much it makes other things easier. And so somehow I was able to say, just give me a little bit. I’m going to go upstairs and talk to The Chorus.
Now, I had hoped to record something this week, but instead, all my recording equipment will be in my Tupperware somewhere as we move around between places with the evacuation. And I came up here to sit down to check in with The Chorus, and I thought, well, I’d like to share it with you.
I am sad right now. We were supposed to stay in this rental house till the end of the week, and now everything’s been accelerated and we’re basically moving out tonight. And it’s one of those examples, isn’t it? I didn’t even know I had a mental projection of how long we would stay here until suddenly it changed. And now I find myself grieving.
I guess the final few days I thought we would have in this beautiful house. Maybe the things I thought I would have time to do or enjoy doing as we prepared to move. And just like they’ve suggested in this season, it’s not until something suddenly changes sometimes that we even realize that we were living in a mental projection.
There is a part of me that feels the rightness of everything that’s happening right now in a way I can’t explain. It feels like it’s been in the works for a really long time. In fact, just a couple of weeks ago, I told my husband, I don’t know why, but I feel like we just had to get to October to make a bunch of decisions for our family before October, for some reason, it was just not time. And now here we are in the final days of September and a lot of things are changing very quickly.
So even though I feel both. Even though I feel the rightness and the okay-ness of everything that’s happening, and then I also feel the grief and the fear over the unknown, I think it’s kind of amazing that I can finally still feel a place in between where I want to sit down and just breathe and not pick a winning side and not tell myself it’s all going to be okay or tell myself that it’s not. I just need a minute. And this is when I would usually check in with The Chorus.
So, rather than a preamble by me today and then a message by them today, I’d like to share a discussion. I’d like to share what it’s like to be me, checking in with a whole group of beings in the way our conversations go.
Now, normally, I would not vocalize my part of the conversation. Sometimes I vocalize what they’re saying simply because it’s soothing to hear. I like making it real in my reality on my wavelengths, but it’s really a lot faster to sometimes not speak my part and to just send it to them sort of mentally or emotionally, energetically. And then sometimes I get tired of saying it out loud and so the whole thing happens inside of me.
So I’m going to do my best to say what I would say out loud and also vocalize their part so that you can hear. So already I just turned my attention in their direction. It’s like opening up a door or picking up a phone line. And as soon as I turn in their direction, I am met with a wave of such love and reassurance that I’m crying.
Sometimes it’s that easy. Sometimes I just am not even interested in any words or explanations that come next. It’s just reaching for that loving place and that loving place responds.
In the beginning, it was super subtle and kind of hard to convince myself that I was actually feeling anything. And now it’s so obvious. Everything in me relaxes. I feel like I’m getting a big hug from someone I love so much. And it’s because it’s such a loving sensation that I realized how much tension I was holding or how much fear I was holding by contrast.
So then I might simply say something like, “Hi guys”, because I know they feel everything that I’m feeling – don’t really need to describe it all. But if I felt like I wanted to, I might say something like, “What the fuck”. Or I’m feeling a lot of things to which they reply, “Dear one, there’s so much that you are aware of right now. We celebrate so much your choice of these frequencies, your ability to choose them consciously, your choice to share them, we see much of what is coming. And it is our perspective, but these will bring joyful things.
And then I find myself worrying about the safety of everyone here. And I sort of reply a little bit annoyed. “You know, the whole human experiencing distraction thing is getting a little old.” To which they reply, “Rightly so, we would agree. However, we would agree from a very particular perspective, where you are also resonating, which can see, can feel and understand the totality of what you chose in being here – what you created. The power of the manifestations that you all have contributed to in this reality, where there can be these kinds of experiences of destruction, powerlessness, and unknown. And as you know by now, it is when you are tiring of these things that you are very much coming to consciousness of them, and on the cusp of moving into a new position of power of choice in these things.”
Now I’m getting a series of memories actually of other conversations that we’ve had in which I get like so over something right before a major breakthrough. And I’m remembering several of those times right now. You could say that The Chorus sent over those images to me. You could also say that I am now resonant in their understanding. And so I can more easily reach those other frequencies of those other times when these things sort of shared this similar resonance. Either way you want to look at it.
Now believe it or not, I am already over the hurricane. Everything that I’ve felt in the last few minutes is so soothing that I am re-energized. My confidence is restored. I feel like I can continue to be present in everything that’s about to happen the rest of this evening. And so this sort of achy need to understand why all of this is happening just softens. It fades into the background. And a curiosity has just cropped up inside of me.
Years ago, I could not have dropped this this fast. I would have like kind of kept digging and I would have been like, “Oh, why hurricanes, and how do I know, and what should I do to help other people?” Like it would have been, it would have felt almost threatening or a risk to just be okay with an impending disaster. It would have felt very foolish even. My fear response would have actually activated even more by way of this sensation or this concept that I am not worried any longer about, in this case, a hurricane.
So today it’s a lot faster and a lot easier, but already I feel restored. I feel like I have new energy to go downstairs and finish loading the truck. And in its place that energy sort of carries forward and I’m brought around to a question, a wondering.
Okay, this is hard to slow down because I actually am realizing now that I just sent them back in response to the string of memories that I received, a field of questions that all relate to different curiosities that I have been experiencing lately.
In the second book, towards the end, they talk about concurrent manifestations – so the idea that the things that are happening all around us are actually related. I’ve learned over time that when I start to see a pattern in something, it’s usually reflecting some new piece of information to me. And so I have just sent over to them a pattern I’ve been noticing of several different mysteries or curiosities that keep coming up again. And they each might seem unrelated. However, now that we’re having this connection, I’m starting to feel a similarity between these different things.
I have been wondering lately about the potential in water. The water beings have been describing to me that water is much more than we perceive it to be. And it is reflective of energetic resonance in a way that we don’t yet understand. And that there are ways to experience water in ways that are constructive – meaning we go from sort of fearing storms on the sea and experiencing those sorts of destructive storms, into a new understanding of water and our relationship to it and other things that it is capable of that would actually assist us.
So I’m sending over to them memories of these conversations that I’ve been having, walks on the beach where I’ve been realizing something about water, the idea of all of this water and hurricane and the storm system. And I’m also simultaneously wondering about current events. I guess you could say experiences of destruction that are starting to crop up, I guess, all over the world in terms of things shutting down, or financial systems breaking, or supply chains fracturing or currency systems declining – wars, aspects of destruction, you could say. So I’m sending them all of that too.
Good thing they have a really big catcher’s mitt. And the overarching question is sort of like, are we or how are we turning the corner on all of this? And to be honest, I probably wouldn’t even be that specific about the question. I would sort of just feel around in my energy for all sorts of things that feel connected and just kind of toss them over and see what they had to say.
So they respond, “Yes, beloved one. And it is by your perspective between these two worlds that you are able to recognize more of the capacity in the natural world around you to respond to and support humanity’s desires. Your desires right now are reflective of an expansive energy.
As you all are awakening, you are turning towards more of the variety of creation that is around you, more of the love that is represented by these beings who are more resonant with expansive and loving perspectives. And therefore you understand and can allow for the experience of human destruction for you are partly resonant with it. You have come from this place and you do not invalidate it nor energize it.
And simultaneously you are deepening your conscious recognition of these other frequencies that you have reached. And manifestations are starting to unfold which would represent different potentials in what might otherwise be construed as nothing other than a destructive event.
There is potential in everything. The ability to connect to that potential is simply a perspective, a choice to resonate in a type of energy, a choice that you all had blinded yourselves to. Quite masterfully, we might add. Dear one, all that is required for you or any other is to remain open to the possibility of these two things: that all might exist in an expansive universe without nullifying any other, and in allowing all of these perspectives, the ones that you desire and prefer are brought to the forefront – will shine most brightly. Because in allowing all perspectives, you are able to see that which you prefer. It may seem not unlike a miracle to experience something so constructive in what someone might only view as destructive.
This becomes the way that many others access these energies – not because they are a replacement for a most precious experience of limitation and all of creation, but because it resonates in them – is recognized by them as an expansion – as an amplification of their freedom to choose just as you are choosing right now.”
And now feeling all of their voices, I am overwhelmed by such a feeling of, “It’s all okay and it’s all working out” that is so strong that it’s a mystery to me that I ever thought that it might not be. And if you give me a few minutes, my brain will kick in again, and then it will come up with a lot of reasons as to why I thought it might not be okay. But in this moment of having received the fullness of this message, the perspective of okay-ness feels so valid and on such equal footing with anything else that I’ve ever believed that it seems so easy to just be.
And now I would probably space out for a little bit, just hang out in my chair, let my physical body sort of acclimate to all of this energy. I might just sit here and think about nothing. I just wouldn’t even keep track of my brain. I just sort of be in it. Then eventually I would sort of come back into the room, into the thought about the next thing that needs to be done.
But I can tell you I will feel a lot less urgency to run down the stairs and keep packing. I’m much more interested in seeing my family, which is downstairs, than the dubs that we have to load. It’s a total shift in perspective.
I don’t know that I’ve said this enough, how much I appreciate that I get to share these things with you all. I know that nobody vibrates to this place by accident. It’s kind of really fun to know that you all probably feel them or feel these things too – probably all in really unique ways that I can’t wait to hear about. But having a place where you can share a thing that others enjoy sharing into is really a magical place to be.
And now to close out before the discussion, I want to bring The course back through to say anything else that they would like to say to you.
THE CHORUS
[Starts at 21:30]
All our dear and most cherished ones who are encountering this message, this resonance, these words and these concepts in any fashion… our greatest love to you all. You are not alone in anything that you are facing. We are with you. We devote and contribute our energies to everything that you are experiencing all of the time.
In the days and weeks to come, you might even feel us or even catch glimpses of us. Your energetic perceptions will tell you first what we are, perhaps a sense of familiarity, curiosity, quiet surprise, or even a sense of having missed us – those whom, on some levels, you may have recognized for quite some time and are now bringing that to consciousness.
Yes, there was a period of time when you did not know we were there, but in this present moment, you are feeling that way because you recognize that we are. Ultimately, you cannot falter. This awakening is assured, and we all celebrate your choice to be here with us.
For we love you all, infinitely.
Discussion with Katie
[Starts at 24:04]
It’s been one week since Hurricane Ian made landfall in Florida, and it has been a roller coaster. Honestly, I just re-listened to what I recorded right before the hurricane and that sense of trust is a mystery to me. It’s not a thing I have felt these last seven days, but I also recognize as I say that that I really don’t have any good reasons to not feel that way.
I mean on paper we fared really well. We had two nights in a perfectly safe evacuation shelter. All of our stuff remained dry and intact. Our cars are fine. We had no home to lose. When we ran out of water, we had friends who brought us buckets of hose water. When we needed the air conditioning fixed, someone was available to come fix it. I mean, as far as hurricanes go – where other people have completely lost their entire homes and everything in it, or their lives – we’re better than fine. And yet it feels very precarious, very risky and unnatural to say that somehow.
Since the hurricane I have experienced what I would say was a kickback, like we’ve talked about in some of the live sessions, from a spiritual experience. I describe the kickback as sometimes, after moving forward in a spiritual direction, there is an integration process which can sometimes feel quite brutal. If you have shot yourself far out into spiritual frequencies, as you return back to the five senses, your awareness and sense of the limitation is in some ways accelerated and it can feel rough.
Now what’s mind-boggling to me is that I didn’t consider the hurricane a spiritual experience. In fact, I have not been able to go near The Chorus’s direction at all in these last seven days, the kickback is so intense. I don’t trust it. I don’t believe it. I feel like I’ve been betrayed and lied to. I feel like I would be an idiot to ever open up to them ever again.
And on top of that, my spiritual and mysterious experiences have only continued in the last seven days. So not only do I feel like I am buckling under the weight of all of these unknown and inexplicable experiences that we talk about, and some that I haven’t even talked about yet… I feel like they’re a pile of lies. They’re not real. All those fear parts of me and anger parts of me and protection parts of me are totally at war with all the parts of me that hope, that trust and that believe.
As usual with another spiritual step, I find myself feeling like it’s all happening all over again. The worst of the worst of the worst of the times that I can remember and here we are yet again. I know that often beliefs will rise up to paint the picture that these things are the same as all other things as a way of balancing the incoming energy. And yet I don’t deny the fact that that’s how I feel.
I’m tired of holding together these two parts of me – the spiritual side… the hopeful, trusting, loving, eager for the next expansion side, and the part of me that’s pissed, that’s tired, that’s angry, and that is so sad for all the destruction that is everywhere around me right now.
I remembered, over the last week, the one part of the message I recorded at the start of the episode when The Chorus says that we’re with you through all of this. And in these last seven days, as I remembered that, it did nothing other than get me more pissed off. Where the fuck were you guys? People were drowning, houses were crumbling, an entire island was practically washed into the sea. Where were you?
I don’t know that I’ve ever expected or demanded that The Chorus help me out on physical wavelengths, but in this very physical place that I have been the last seven days, it just doesn’t feel like any of that energetic spiritual stuff matters. It’s not material here.
It’s great to enjoy or to feel or to try when everything is relatively under control, but when shit hits the fan and you’re trying to find water or food, who the fuck has time to meditate? And you know what the worst part is? For better or worse, I feel like this is a precursor of everything humanity’s about to start going through. Waves of chaos and destruction that sure, some of us somehow emerge from unscathed, but others won’t.
I’m tired of these two worlds. I’m tired of these things being separate. I’m tired of everybody else telling us that we have choice and that we chose to be here. And yet we’re continuing to suffer through things that, from this conscious perspective at least, I know that many of us would not have chosen freely.
Choice keeps coming up again and again for me lately as I talk to friends who are in alien abduction circles. Don’t feel like they chose that. So I have friends who are suffering through some aspect of insecurity – whether their job just disappeared, the grocery store isn’t stocked like it used to, things that we’re afraid of. I really don’t think we would have chosen that.
Oh, and you better believe I hear that side of me, alive within me right now, that’s saying, “Well, it could all work out. Maybe it’s worth it.” I’m fucking tired of that voice. I’m tired of it because it’s never, it’s never completely it. Somehow I always end up back here. And you know what? Sometimes holding out hope hurts.
So it feels like I have a few choices. I can either continue to vent on all of you who have tuned into this episode, which seems a little unjust. I can open back up to The Chorus for the first time in a week, and you and I can both communicate with that energy and the beings that represent it there. Or I can just try and pull myself out of this some way and continue to talk about things that I know need to come up. And maybe it’s time. What would you choose?
When you are on the receiving end of chaos, what choice will you make on the other side? When we, as a civilization, are looking at new rubble from our destruction, will we choose to be able to see that from a constructive perspective? What is left inside of us that makes it so hard to feel like we have that choice?
Why is it that I feel awful by choosing to see that I got through this perfectly fine even when others didn’t? If their perspective can be valid, why can’t mine? Sometimes we call this survivor guilt – sensation that comes over many who have been lucky enough to survive a great catastrophe or even a small one unscathed. We ask ourselves many questions. Why us? How come we got so lucky? How come they didn’t?
But as is often the case with guilt, what it is doing is placing a judgment over the aspects of us that did survive. It is calling into question that manifestation and everything that led to it. It highlights the riskiness and the uncertainty as opposed to looking at that chain of events as equally possible as all other outcomes.
As we talked about earlier this season, our belief and our ability to destroy is perhaps one of the first and most fundamental aspects of limitation that we had, and have resonated with, here in this experience. Notice how it carries through in our lives and all of the ways that we see that things could potentially go wrong. Even as far as casting doubt on situations where it did go right.
We have talked about this aspect of ourselves many times. In psychology, as a society, in different cultures. Why is it that the chance that things could go wrong feels so much more palpable and pertinent to us than all the ways that it could go right?
It’s easy to understand why we have dismissed this question because it opens the door to perhaps the fundamental basis of life and existence beyond limitation in which all things, all beings, all consciousnesses are given the freedom to choose. If something could go well, right beside something that is not, the difference between those things is a difference in frequency. And once we recognize that, the game is up.
If you, and I, and all of us are no longer subject to destruction, if we could all vibrate into different positions in the town where the tornado does not strike, if we could choose to build things in places where we know those calamities are not energetically possible, then we are no longer limited.
I’d like to think that I was at that place. And I guess in some ways I was. But I still view my proximity to this disaster, and my ability to prevent it for so many others, as indicative of the fact that I didn’t have a choice. My guilt doesn’t so much tie me into an inability to see how it worked out for me. My guilt ties me to the way that it did not work out for others, and therefore I cannot trust the ways in which it worked out for me.
Guilt is perhaps one of the greatest aspects of our group consensus. If we wait for all others who participate in this game to agree with us or to experience what it is that we are experiencing before we allow ourselves to experience it, we will be waiting for a very long time. In fact, a construct of linear time by which we agree to participate through one of our most massive and most major constructs, which is guilt.
Guilt and time, a lot like shame and time, are closely intertwined. Oftentimes, we feel guilty over things in which we stepped out of a line – would be a way to look at it from an energetic perspective. As a group consensus, we agree to all remain in lock step. Guilt is our sensation when we have stepped out of, ever so slightly and ever too much, the group consensus of our own limitations.
Oftentimes we have this particular sensation of guilt when we have perhaps a stroke of luck, when we were having such a good time that we forgot to do something that we owed or had agreed to do for somebody else.
Guilt – though we apply this word in many situations – from an energetic sense is this aspect of which we are discussing. It is the ways in which we somehow achieved something, received something, that we are somehow made aware that others do not, did not, or cannot.
Guilt, ever so gently and sometimes quite painfully, pulls us back into the limitations. We regret, in some ways, what we did receive or what we were able to achieve.
Today in our societies, we have become aware that some of the most successful people in our cultures don’t really feel this. They have found ways to become okay with the receiving that they have.
Have you ever looked at a celebrity and wondered to yourself, that person made tens of millions of dollars for standing up in front of a camera and holding a bottle of deodorant and saying that? It boggles the mind not simply because it is sometimes an amount of money that many of us can’t even fathom ever getting at all, but also it calls into question all the ideas that we’ve created for ourselves about how difficult it might be to make that much money or have that much success.
These are the beliefs that are created by the group consensus. These are the actions, the requirements of being in a limited reality that we tell ourselves we must exert. And typically we tell ourselves that we must do all of this work over a long period of time in order to achieve those things that we desire.
We’ve talked about this earlier this season in terms of an overnight success. If you woke up tomorrow with a six pack, you might question if that six pack were actually real, because it violated a period of time that we think is required in order to achieve that thing.
Guilt often flags this same time-based rule that is violated. We may feel a sensation of guilt when we receive something that would have otherwise taken a long time for other people to get or to have, or when there is a lot of receiving in a condensed period of time right alongside the perception of others who did not experience that same acceleration in that same period of time.
Let’s say that you’ve just arrived at planet Earth, and you’re looking around at our society, and you’re saying to yourself, “Holy crap, all these people look exactly the same.” – as The Chorus often says. But even more so than that, you’re realizing that the entire society basically functions as a singular unit in terms of the coherency of beliefs and mind-body expressions.
Almost every single participant, to varying degrees, is capable of doing only so many things, and only in so much time, and only affecting so many other people. They can all write books, but they can’t actually bend the fabric of space-time to directly convey information without being imperceptible to the rest of the populace. They can only grow food. They cannot actually shape-shift or alter their physical forms to no longer require food without, of course, getting kicked out of the game and no longer being perceptible by the remainder of their group consensus.
We as humans feel a lot of variety in our days and in the people that we meet. And that is because we are resonant, within the game, coming out of it – in which we are not really able to imagine very often, and in the course of our day-to-day lives, the myriad possibilities that would be otherwise possible in every choice that we make.
When we turn on the car every morning, we’re not simultaneously aware of all the other perceptions about transportation and distance. When we go to open the fridge door, we are not also simultaneously aware of all the other ways to access things and move through space.
Life has felt, quote-unquote, “normal” to us humans, because that is the way that we defined it collectively. Our sense of control is our sense of fit of all of the things that manifest around us into our idea of the way that life and space and the world exist.
Now of course, this is all coming into question. Things seem to be happening faster than they ought. Some people are capable of achieving something that they maybe shouldn’t have been able to. All of these rules of the group consensus are bending. And as some of us stretch out beyond them, one of the beliefs with which we may come face to face is all the things that bring to us the emotional experience of guilt.
When I recorded the introduction to this week’s episode, I could not have anticipated that by a week later, I would be grappling with intense amounts of guilt. – on top of all sorts of responses from my belief system about control and prevention and protection and everything else. Not only do I feel like I can’t get happy about the way that things worked out for us, I definitely can’t trust it. It was a fluke. It was a stroke of luck.
There’s nothing in it that I would ever have control over to be able to repeat in the future. I can’t tell a hurricane where to land and to tell it not to land where I am. And that’s true. And I won’t fight it. I give up.
Years and years of inexplicable things and somehow I came through it unscathed yet again. Maybe unscathed in body, but emotionally and spiritually right now, I am a complete wreck. It sucks sometimes to admit that you don’t have control. But lately, I’ve started to wonder if that’s actually what I’m admitting when I do that. Am I really giving up… hope? Am I really giving up the idea that I could make choices that might work out well for me when I say I’m not in control?
As you heard at the start of this episode, The Chorus approaches everything from a place of love and honoring whatever it is that they have come into contact with. And here is this concept, which I loathe feeling as a human, of being not in control and of feeling bad for the good things that happen to me. And I don’t want to feel this way.
But if I listen closely to what The Chorus has said about not invalidating other perspectives, and if I acknowledge that, and allow for the possibility that I was not in control. Really, it may not have much to do with me at all. That idea of our individuality, and what we got and what someone didn’t, is a very constructed, very human idea that blinds us from the fact that there are many valid perspectives in the universe.
When I finally give up, when I finally open my hands or fall down on my knees and I say, “You’re right, I wasn’t in control in that situation.” What I am releasing is my participation in a place where that needed to be true. I am releasing my resonance with participation in an aspect of our group consensus where I had to be in control in order to be safe.
By way of doing that, what I am resonating with instead, is a loving perspective that acknowledges that those kinds of experiences and beliefs are real. They are valid and many people are resonating with them still. It shifts from being about me to being about a belief and a place that I and others can experience.
It is not dissimilar from a sensation of choosing to vibrate with the loving frequencies from which we hear the views of The Chorus. Though it may be counterintuitive for a lot of us at this juncture because it’s very new, choice, on energetic frequencies, actually feels to us a lot like allowing.
Every time we say, “Okay, yep, that could be true; I see that,” we are actually choosing our preference. By validating all things, we are validating ourselves. It’s not about making the right choice of where to shelter, or you shouldn’t have moved to that state, or I’ll never live there because of climate change. Those are actually constructed patterns of a group consensus that has a lot of rules based on guilt.
The corollary to guilt, as we well know, is blame. And oftentimes when we are feeling guilty, we will receive a response of blame from those around us. These two things have driven many of our choices, have driven many of the ways that we viewed ourselves and what we could do. When we begin to acknowledge that all things are possible, that all things are valid, we step out of the fight for the need to validate what we believe.
My friends, I don’t know how we came through this last hurricane unscathed. Is that scary to say? Partially. But the other part of me takes a deep breath, because I know that it’s true.
The part of me that’s scared wants to know how we can prevent and stop these kinds of storms. The part of me that is allowing of the idea of an experience of lack of control knows how very simple it could be to just step around all hazards and all disasters.
There are so many places to move. There are so many solutions. There are so many clever ways of creating paths forward for all the many ways that we wish to live. And what about the ones that can’t sidestep? What about the ones that, even if we moved, we couldn’t move with us? What about all of that? Yeah, I hear the questions from that part of me too. And you know what? That’s valid. I don’t know.
Someone told me once they might still be benefiting from the experiences of limitation the same way I have. I don’t know that I’m far enough along this road to be able to see it in that way. But today at least, I feel a little less bad, slightly less guilty, for what it is that I have been given.
Because I do have a choice. In choosing to honor, to acknowledge, to recognize, to even empathize with what it is that all others have and are experiencing, I make that choice for myself too. And then, who knows, maybe one day we can get to the place where The Chorus is, where we will not only be able to validate, acknowledge, honor, and empathize with all the perspectives in the universe, we will also celebrate them too.